It really began to set in when I got the Mixon touchdown notification for the third time that my day was fucking over. It didn’t end there. He kept pounding. Between 0 Mixon and Aaron Jones finding his floor, I got absolutely dick-dusted.
I think it’s safe to say a few things:
1) Herbert is absolutely unplayable at anywhere near $7.2k.
2) The Packers are unplayable as a team and anyone playing against them is also unplayable outside of maybe the defense.
3) Joe Mixon got lucky and I’m so fucking tilted.
Somehow I didn’t lose it all, but it was close. The Kenneth Walker late hammer salvaged my day a small amount. Is -90% really any better than -100%?
Onto Monday Night Football.
I’m playing the Ravens’ defense. We all saw the Red Cock Rocket’s last prime-time performance. The Ravens D is allowing the 3rd fewest rushing yards in the NFL and if Lamar can get cooking the Saints will be forced to throw. There is nothing that can convince me that the Cock Rocket won’t throw multiple picks again. I normally cannot justify playing a defense, but their ownership shouldn’t be as high as the previous few weeks and Dalton is a walking turnover.
Alvin Kamara is a lock. You might be thinking to yourself, “Cash God, what the fuck? Didn’t you just say the Ravens defense is great against the run?”. We’ve seen enough of the Red Cock Rocket to know what’s going on here. Kamara’s targets the last 3 games have been 10, 9, and 9. I expect the Saints to be forced to pass more than they’d like in this game script. Dalton will not stop feeding Alvin Kamara.
Don’t be fooled by the shutout of the Raiders last week. The Raiders’ entire team was paint-jobbing the actual toilets at the Superdome all day with some sort of flu. This Saints’ defense is dogshit. They are allowing the 6th-most points per game even with that shutout. Before the shutout they had 3 straight games go over 50 total points (one of them over 70) and I can assure you that has nothing to do with their offense being good. I’m playing as many Ravens as possible.
There is no fading Isaiah Likely this week and he is clearly the best captain on the slate. When Andrews went down, he looked like his preseason form, dicks out. He played the most snaps of anyone on offense besides Lamar and ran the most routes on the team. I’ll be balls fucking deep.
The only Saints I’d consider playing (other than Kamara) are Tre-Quan Smith, Will Nutz, and get your Juwan Johnson’s out.
I could really use a solo $500k tonight.
I’ll be back on Friday with the main slate preview.
-CashGod-
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Photo: Christian Petersen | Credit: Getty Images
The Cash God 