It’s been an all time bad run this year and to close out the season. I have had very few positive weeks. But it just takes one. All I take from that is that variance MUST be at an all time high this year. The playoffs are an easy spot to get it all back on track. I have no doubt I’m going to take my fucking cock out on these slates. Maybe 3 straight Milly Maker wins? I’m going to do what is thought to be impossible.

My favorite stack of the first slate has to be Flacco and the Browns. This KC-Miami game isn’t worth playing and Flacco has a legacy run on his mind this year. He will be the highest owned QB but I will not be on the outside looking in when he drags his cock on the turn in Houston. Flacco-Ford-Cooper-Njoku mega stack with Schultz on the comeback.

I’m avoiding nearly everyone in the KC-Miami game, but playing Mostert over Achane for leverage only. I considered Kelce, but he might actually finally be washed so it’s Rashee Rice time. Those are about the only players I considered in this game. It’s going to be way too fucking cold and this total (43.5) is far too high. There isn’t a chance the over hits.

Take a random defense this week. My favorite is probably Houston since there will most likely be the most drop backs in that game, but whatever fits.

Live shot of Flacco motivating his team in the locker room:

This Bills game getting moved completely fucked up the schedule. I assume they will do 3 separate slates. 2-2-2.

I’m going to be BALLS FUCKING DEEP on the Stafford stacks. This is the game of his life. My favorite stack is Staffy-Williams-Kupp with a Jameson Williams comeback. This is his coming out party.

I’ll ignore the Buffalo game for now. I was going to probably mostly ignore it anyway with the teams and weather. The other plays I like on Sunday are Pollard, Aaron Jones and Brandin Cooks. I’m going to be slipping Tucker fucker Kraft into as many lineups as possible. At $3.3k I don’t care if Musgrave is back that’s just a great price. Kraft through the Dallas D all afternoon:

Similar to the Saturday slate, I’ll likely play any defense that fits on Sunday. I’ll lean towards Dallas or the Rams.

It’s time for the Cash God Guarantee. It’s Aaron Jones. He might be in the middle of the best usage stretch of his career and they will be needing him all fucking day on Sunday. Quads is doubtful so it will once again be all Aaron Jones. I expect them to absolutely geese him with targets and carries once Love inevitably goes off the rails. This is the weekend I win 3 straight Milly Makers. It’s almost a guarantee.