Tag: fantasy

  • Week 6 NFL DFS Preview: Rattler Snake and King Henry Save my Year

    Week 6 NFL DFS Preview: Rattler Snake and King Henry Save my Year

    I didn’t do a full writeup last week but still got completely fucking blasted. I landed on the Burrow stack and STILL didn’t even cash. I am either so fucking bad or nobody runs worse. Thinking the latter. There’s only one way to save this sinking ship and that’s to fire away again this week.…

  • Week 16 NFL Preview: Back to the JT Well

    Week 16 NFL Preview: Back to the JT Well

    Who the fuck thought it was ok to put this Saturday night game only on Peacock? If the first game had gone a little better for my lineup I would have considered paying for the sweat. Fucking Peacock. It’s time for the main slate. I don’t give a fuck what the game total is. It’s…

  • NFL DFS Week 14 Preview: Mixon Up a Batch

    NFL DFS Week 14 Preview: Mixon Up a Batch

    Last week was somehow good. I had Purdy and Deebo, but completely fucked up the running backs with Bijan and Warren. I’m not sure what was going o with Warren other than a self dick gurgling ceremony. Regardless, I had a good lineup and profited on the week. It’s been a bad year, so it…

  • Thanksgiving Day Special: Frankenstein Gobbles

    Thanksgiving Day Special: Frankenstein Gobbles

    I somehow cashed some entries last week, including the Sunday Night Showdown by .01 of a point. Despite that I still fucking deposited this week. I see the ball well on Thanksgiving Slates and have always liked them the most. This is a Cash God Legacy slate tomorrow. It’s time for Jordan Love. I think…

  • Week 10 NFL DFS Preview: Aiyuk and the Bijan Well

    Week 10 NFL DFS Preview: Aiyuk and the Bijan Well

    Here I am, ready to whip it out again when Chris Olave scores his first TD of the game. I’m thinking I did it again with the CGG. He, along with Derek Carb, proceed to blow ass the rest of the game and I’m left holding my dick in my hand. The real plan should’ve…

  • Week 9 NFL DFS Preview: Olave and the Squeaky Wheel

    Week 9 NFL DFS Preview: Olave and the Squeaky Wheel

    Last week was one of the all time best. Lamb scored the most points on the slate at 5% ownership. I was crotch chopping in the living room after the second TD and it only got better as the game went on. This is around the point in the season where the slate just flows…

  • Week 8 NFL DFS Preview: Bust Out the Lambo

    Week 8 NFL DFS Preview: Bust Out the Lambo

    It might be a surprise to hear, but I got completely blasted by the slate again last week. We are nearing the halfway point of the season and this is my worst run yet. I played Lamar, but that wasn’t enough to overcome the Aaron Jones dud and got completely fucking wiped. All I can…

  • Week 7 NFL DFS Preview: Jones’ Eruption

    Week 7 NFL DFS Preview: Jones’ Eruption

    My day was over long before Fields dislocated his cock or whatever happened last Sunday, but that was the nail in my coffin. I thought it was finally my week when Walker scored an early touchdown and Thielen was fucking blasting off, but it went the other direction very quickly. I’ve been on bad variance…

  • Week 4 NFL DFS Preview: I Chase Losses

    Week 4 NFL DFS Preview: I Chase Losses

    I lost everything again last week. Bijan had his worst week of the season and Fields was somehow almost worse. I had way too much of those two along with Mike Williams and got completely blasted for all of my entry fees. This has been an all-time bad year. I’m either fucking terrible or variance…

  • Week 3 NFL DFS Preview: Bijan Busts the Slate

    Week 3 NFL DFS Preview: Bijan Busts the Slate

    I fucking lost it all again last week. There’s nothing worse than being in the top 10 for the first hour of the slate and finishing with absolutely nothing. I was full-blown midnight when I looked at my phone after the second first quarter Richardson TD. Richardson going down followed by the ETN icicles was…