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Week 1 NFL DFS Preview: Jet Blasts Off
We are fucking back. 2 games in and I’m already down 100%. I was parading around almost all week about not drafting anyone over the age of 26, even going as far as taking an early victory lap after Mark Andrews removed a rib and sucked his own dick on Thursday night. Then Barkley had…
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Week 12 NFL DFS Preview: Stevenson and the Gardner Snake Uncoiling
The Thanksgiving slate started off hot – it usually does. It went downhill quickly as the chalk slappies hit with Dak and Dallas defense. CMC took his cock out on national TV and my fate was sealed. I min cashed one lineup in the Milly, but that was it. The bankroll is totally fucked. Onto…
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Week 7 NFL DFS Preview: Jones’ Eruption
My day was over long before Fields dislocated his cock or whatever happened last Sunday, but that was the nail in my coffin. I thought it was finally my week when Walker scored an early touchdown and Thielen was fucking blasting off, but it went the other direction very quickly. I’ve been on bad variance…
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Week 2 NFL DFS Preview: Etienne and the Well
All things considered week 1 could have been a lot worse. Don’t get me wrong I got completely dick blasted by the slate, but I didn’t lose it all despite not having as much Tyreek as I needed and having nearly 100% Cooper. There’s no beating around the bush here. Deshaun Watson is fucking terrible.…
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Week 14 Preview: Sanders and the Bad Stack
There is nothing worse than going into a week thinking you read the slate like a book only to see an absolute 0 at the end of the day. We finally had some good games and I performed a dick-gurgling routine on myself with Lawrence, Mahomes, and Herbert. I’m not sure how many times I…
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Week 12 NFL DFS Preview: Hide the Cameraman
After getting almost last on Monday after the Rondale Moore injury, it became worse on Thursday. Pollard was fucking terrible and I ended up with a few too many double Bills RB. That alone should be enough to automatically deactivate my DraftKings account. I had no faith in the Kirk stacks without Darrisaw and against…
The Cash God 