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John Deere Classic Preview: The Grand Slam Breakfast

I’m back after recovering from what was an absolute fucking disaster at the U.S. Open. I cashed 0 of my lineups as Homa missed the cut and the rest of my plays gurgled their own fucking dicks for 36-72 holes. I’m still so tilted. Good thing this John Deere Classic field isn’t one of the…
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Mexico Open Preview: Byeong Hun and the Year of Rahm

I took one look at this field and almost took the week off. Not only do we have 12k chalk Rahm, but we also have some incredible names in the top two price ranges. I was off last week due to the team format and still recovering from Zalatoris Masters WD. Onto the Mexico Open.…
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RBC Heritage Preview: Shane the Brain and the Recurring Well

My results last week were an absolute abomination. I went into the slate thinking it was mine to lose only to have Willy Z withdraw prior to the first round, eliminating over 50% of my lineups. Will I learn from this and not go so heavy on one golfer? No. Will I ever play Zalatoris…
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THE PLAYERS Championship Preview: Will the Thrill and the Cycle of Hits

Last week was a complete abomination. Here I was whipping my dick out and swinging it around after I see Rahm’s first round. Little did I know he would proceed to shit bricks for the rest of the tourney. My lineup was already dead when Byeong An withdrew with what they are describing as a…
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Butterfield Bermuda Championship Preview: S.H. Kim and the Jaegerbombs

I said this a few weeks ago, but I’m rescinding it now because this one somehow tops it. This is the worst field of all time. I get fucking blasted by NFL this weekend and this is what I open up the PGA section of the app and see. I didn’t think there was a…
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The CJ Cup Preview: Hovland and the Dustballs

I have a lot of respect for my fellow degens still grinding these golf tournaments with me. I got blasted last week as a result of Bigdicki having the worst round of his life on his home course. Matt Wallace also appeared to forget what a golf club was on his way to a 64th-place…