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PGA Championship Preview: Always Play the Hits
Holy shit I wasn’t sure if my bankroll would make it to another major. The past month and a half have been so fucking bad. I’ve lost every single week. What’s even more tilting is as I scroll through this week’s field I see a prominent name missing. Where the fuck is Jason Cockrack? That…
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AT&T Byron Nelson Preview: K.H. Lee Saves My Balance
I called it early last week after Luke List became Luke Lost. SE Kim didn’t help. I have a hard time watching the rest of these random tournaments after my lineups are completely dead. The field this week actually has a few bigger names, but it’s AT&T Byron Nelson so I’m tempering my expectations. I…
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Wells Fargo Championship Preview: Mitchell, the Well and the Geezer
Hank Ligbofa had the worst day at his job last week and it made me swim with the fucking bots all weekend. I could hardly look. This week, we begin with a tradition unlike any other. The clicking of the exclude button on Rory. It’s been good to me so far this year especially during…
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Mexico Open Preview: Byeong Hun and the Year of Rahm
I took one look at this field and almost took the week off. Not only do we have 12k chalk Rahm, but we also have some incredible names in the top two price ranges. I was off last week due to the team format and still recovering from Zalatoris Masters WD. Onto the Mexico Open.…
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RBC Heritage Preview: Shane the Brain and the Recurring Well
My results last week were an absolute abomination. I went into the slate thinking it was mine to lose only to have Willy Z withdraw prior to the first round, eliminating over 50% of my lineups. Will I learn from this and not go so heavy on one golfer? No. Will I ever play Zalatoris…
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The Masters Preview: Cam Smith and the Return of Jason
GEOOOOOORGIAAAAAA GEOOOOORGIA GEOOOOORGIA ON MY MIIIIIIIND. The time has finally come. After treading through some absolutely ass shit fields and tournaments we have finally arrived at the first major of the year. I’m not even going to mention last week’s results. Ryan Fox let me down in the biggest way anyone has all year. I…
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Valspar Championship Preview: Gurgling Down Another Denny’s Grand Slam
The unthinkable happened last week. I had a 6/6 that didn’t cash. Zalatoris had his worst day in the job. It would’ve been better had he just missed the cut and saved me any hope of cashing. The agony of opening the app on Sunday afternoon and seeing a 0 was overwhelming. I’m embarrassed to…
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THE PLAYERS Championship Preview: Will the Thrill and the Cycle of Hits
Last week was a complete abomination. Here I was whipping my dick out and swinging it around after I see Rahm’s first round. Little did I know he would proceed to shit bricks for the rest of the tourney. My lineup was already dead when Byeong An withdrew with what they are describing as a…
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Arnold Palmer Invitational Preview: Fitzmagic and The Year of Rahm
I had my 3rd 6/6 single entry on the year last week. I ended up with Lowry, Pendick, Vegas, Jaegerbombs, S. Kim, and Hicock. I got lucky and dodged the Denny dick gurgling because I couldn’t fit him in with Pendick and Lowry, but liked him as a play going into the tournament. Kim had…
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The Honda Classic Preview: Pendick and the Hits
Last week didn’t do my bankroll any favors. I already tweeted about it but I’ll say it again. One week without NFL has turned into a blank NBA lineup, a placeholder NBA lineup, and $25 lit on fire and flushed down a paint-jobbed toilet via the NASCAR Milly Maker. I am fiending for a win…
The Cash God 